Why Changing Bad Habits is Difficult to Do

Have you ever wondered why, even as rational beings, we consciously and subconsciously engage in self-destructive behaviors? I'll give you a hint: it's not because we are 'weak.'

Bad habits often act as covert saboteurs of our best intentions. Most of the time, these habits serve as a simple coping mechanism for dealing with boredom and stress. We frequently hear the advice that to break a bad habit, we should replace it with a good one. But what does that actually entail?

In order to overcome your bad habits, it's crucial to recognize why they manifest in the first place. Our experiences of boredom and stress often reveal deeper, underlying personal issues that extend beyond the surface. Bad habits persist because they offer certain benefits, whether they are emotional or physical. It's this aspect that makes eliminating them a challenging endeavor.

To successfully replace a bad habit with a healthier one, the new behavior must provide a comparable level of benefit. I understand that it's easier said than done. So, let's dive deeper into why changing bad habits is difficult to do and explore strategies for fostering healthier lifestyles that cater to our emotional, physical, and cognitive(craving/addictive) needs and desires.

We try to changed too much 

Attempting to change multiple bad habits simultaneously can overwhelm us, as it demands significant self-discipline. Radical changes are often unsustainable, and the inability to maintain them can lead to frustration and relapse. The best approach is to initially identify your own unhealthy habits, delve into the root causes behind them, and then formulate a plan for initiating simple and manageable adjustments. Once you feel more at ease you can broaden your understanding of yourself and explore habits that continue to bring you satisfaction while enhancing your overall well-being.

We get stuck into thinking fallacies 

Thinking fallacies, such as black-and-white thinking (seeing habits as either good or bad with no middle ground) or overgeneralization (assuming one failure means you'll always fail), can hinder habit change. These cognitive distortions can lead to self-defeating thoughts, making it difficult to maintain motivation and confidence in the face of setbacks. Identifying and challenging these fallacies is crucial for realistic and sustainable habit change.            

We are motivated by negative emotions

Negative emotions can trigger self-sabotage, as individuals may revert to their bad habits in response to emotional distress. Bad habits often provide immediate relief from negative emotions, making them seem more rewarding than alternatives (healthy behaviors). This emotional relief, however, is often short-lived and can lead to a vicious cycle of dependency on these habits, hindering personal growth and well-being in the long run. Additionally, understanding the connection between emotions and unhealthy habits is a crucial step in breaking free from their grip and fostering a healthier lifestyle.

We try too hard to avoid failure  

A paralyzing fear of failure can deter individuals from attempting any changes in their habits, as they perceive it as a threat to their self-esteem. However, seeing failure as an endpoint rather than a valuable learning opportunity can impede personal growth in the face of setbacks. Setting overly ambitious goals and expecting immediate success can increase the pressure to avoid any sign of failure. It's important to acknowledge that even small changes represent victories, which ultimately pave the way towards achieving your overarching goals. 

Patience and self-compassion are key virtues in this endeavor. It is normal to experience setbacks along the way, but these should be seen as opportunities for learning and growth rather than as reasons to give up. To successfully change bad habits, it is essential to start with a clear understanding of the habit in question and the underlying triggers and motivations. Setting achievable goals, tracking progress, and seeking support from friends, family, or Clinical Counselors can provide valuable assistance in the transformation process.